Call me Nella (Coglio Nella's Song)
Coglio Nello had a dream one day
Logged off as “he,” came back slayin’ “slay”
Said, “I’m reborn, now I’ve got a plan!”
Put on a wig and broke OnlyFans
Painted nails, wore heels so high
Tried to wink but poked his eye
Changed the name, changed the game (well... tried)
But even Siri said, “Girl, please, go hide”
Call me Nella, from the wild unknown
Rockin’ eyeliner like a traffic cone
Tried to flirt, but got left on read
Sent a duck face, scared the chat half-dead
Ohhh Nella, queen of the cringe
Walks in like glam, exits like a glitch
Joined a server just for fun
Posted “Hi besties!” — got blocked by everyone
Tried a live stream — total fail
Mic was off and the cam showed her mail
Thought she’d stun with a smoky eye
But looked like Batman on a pizza high
Said, “I'm fab, I’m fierce, I slay!”
Then tripped on her mic stand and fell away
Call me Nella, from the chat bizarre
Misspells “hello” and thinks she’s a star
Sent a heart to a tech support guy
Now she’s banned from Zoom — don’t ask why
Ohhh Nella, what a hot mess
Wears Crocs to a date, calls it “high finesse”
But you know what? She’s got the spark
Even if her selfies miss the mark
She might confuse "CPU" with "soup"
But she’s first in line for every goof
So call her Nella, queen of the night
A walking typo with questionable sight
She came, she typed, she scared the crowd
But owns it all, and says it loud
“Ohhh Nella, never backin' down,
Even if the Wi-Fi shuts her down!”
“Hello? Is this thing on?
Wait—did I just ban myself again?”
